Photo by Alex Knight on Unsplash

So, I still get updates about my mothers emails on my phone.  She wanted me to be able to get into her email in case she ever forgot her password or to help her out with emails from her doctor.  I normally don't give two craps to even care to look anymore...but today, I saw in my notifications there was one from my aunt.  And that wasn't abnormal, she usually sends her jokes.  But what had peaked my interest this time was that she referenced an advice column.  I am not sure how far back you've read on this blog, but several years ago, I got a "mysterious letter" from someone who didn't leave their return address.  It was written in shitty handwriting and didn't even write out my name, just had my initials.  And inside, it was a photocopied advice column from a yoga magazine about how the questioner was in her 30's had made nothing of her life.  Which was JUST exactly what my mother told my entire family at a family reunion just a few weeks before.  So I knew it was directly related.

But today, it turns out, my instincts were correct.  I clicked to open it and I saw this:



I almost wanted to write back to my aunt as my mother...almost.  Deep down, I know they'd find it and think I was insane for doing so.  So I know better to actually do it, but I thought about writing back:

"Yes, I read it.  It's pretty awful that parents treat their children so badly and then pretend they didn't.  I should know, I am guilty of this."

But alas, I am not stupid.  I know the best route is to leave this alone.  And of course I will.  It's just a shock to me that soooo many people will kiss my mother's ass rather than tell her "Hey, I remember all this stuff that your daughter is saying about you....and it's TRUE!  You weren't the best mother!"

But no....they all think I am the crazy one.  YET, they were there.  They saw my parents be raging drunks for all my childhood.  They saw the abuse, yet are taking her side now.  Which is fine by me, but it's things like this that really get on my nerves.

So, what will I do about it?

If you know me at all, you know I am not going to stand by and do nothing at all.  I mean, I certainly will not directly do anything to them.  That's just petty and stupid.  So, I will take action in a better way.

I decided to ask for my own advice.


I decided to Ask Amy.




Is my intention to have my aunt see this?  Well, I know that most likely my question will not be picked up for publication.  She probably gets hundreds of questions each and every day.  But I would giggle if it did.  And I would laugh hysterically if my aunt saw it.  But even if nobody in my family saw this and it did get published, Amy's answer may help other adult children of narcissistic parents who are dealing with the same thing.  So while my motivations are a little grey, my question is real.  I honestly have no idea what to do with my mother's behavior.  And I am thinking a maybe a little outside help may be necessary before I take any action if my mother continues to harass me.

And if it happens to be seen by the right people, well...then it was meant to be 😜


::::giggle:::::