I just had a really fucked up thought.  

What if...the reason there are so many narcissists in the world, is because they are the norm, and we are the outliers?  What if...in order to survive in this crazy world as prehistoric people, that everyone was born without much empathy?  Because think about it...what evolutionary benefit does empathy help when it comes to surviving in the wilds?  Running away from or fighting wild animals, how does empathy help us there?  

What if we always think that empathy is the norm, but what if it isn't?  And that's why this world is so messed up?  I am not saying they were straight up full-blown sociopaths/psychopaths, I am just wondering if they all had less empathy than normal, like most narcissists today do?  

Studies say all species of man, though some more than others, had empathy.  So, having zero empathy is still the most uncommon thing, but just because a species took care of their sick or elderly, it doesn't mean they were like us (the people with all the empathy).  At least not all of them.  I bet there were some, but I really wonder if various levels of actual narcissism is just the state of the human species, for the most part.  And the only reason why we're so aware of it is because of social media.  

I mean, we never were aware of how many shark attacks happen on a regular basis, and when they started reporting it, we were shocked.  We thought that the sharks had went feral and now were attacking everyone all the time.  Turns out, the shark attacks did not change, just our awareness did.  

And I am thinking that's what going on with narcissism, too.  We think the world has gone mad, but maybe it's always been mad but we're just more aware of it now.  And this is just it.  It exactly how it's always been and always will be.  How freaking depressing is that?  

And this is why I removed myself from most of society.  I want peace.  I crave peace.  I need healing and putting myself in harm's way by surrounding myself with more idiot narcissists is not the way to do it.  I soooo want to start a healing group for people in my town, but I also don't want to, because I know how it will go.  Because narcissists ruin everything.  But I still crave connection.  Sigh.  I just don't know what to do.  

Well, I will think about it and maybe I'll come up with something.  But for now, I am removing myself from groups and other places where drama lives, because I need peace, not more chaos (and since narcissism is the norm, everything is chaos).

Sigh.  How can we connect as a species with so many jackoffs out there?  I just don't know.  Superficially, I suppose.  But I don't crave superficial connection  But at the same time, I kind of do.  

I just know that people ruin everything and it will most likely never be any different.  

I want to go live in the woods and become the scary thing everyone talks about LOL  That way they'll just leave me alone.  Now that sounds like a plan.