So, I found this YouTube channel named Psychology with Dr. Ana.  And her video on estranged parents came up and I started watching it.  After hearing what it said, I started it over and put it on pause.  I then fed my mother dinner and didn't turn on the classical music I normally put on for her while she eats (though I don't think she really likes it, but I do, because I don't like her listening to what I talk about in my room--I think she prefers to have the kitchen silent while she eats so she can easily hear what everyone is talking about in other rooms).  And I turned on the YouTube video on my television.  LOUDLY.  It was a thirty minute video, and it lasted her entire dinner.  And, hopefully, she heard the whole thing. 

Did it do anything?  

Probably not.  My son said "She probably didn't even listen."  And I bet he's right.  But it sure made me feel better.  Yes, it made me feel a little weird, now and then, especially when the Dr. so blatantly called out my mother for her behavior.  The things that hit dead on were like a little stab to my gut and made me almost turn it down out of fear.  But the I remembered: she did this.  Not me.  She is the one at fault.  And while I normally do not call her out for her bad behaviors, I do sometimes.  And usually it's not out of the blue for her.  Not like this.  But sometimes it's warranted and deserved.  

Last night I had dreams about her and my cousins.  I don't remember what about.  I also had dreams bout Sean Puffy Daddy Combs, because I feel asleep watching a documentary about him LOL  Ew.  It was a weird dream where I mixed up a Facebook reel I saw earlier in the day with this documentary haha  About a woman who's boyfriend was cheating on her with a blonde woman.  And P. Didders was diddling with the blonde girl.  So weird.  

Anyways, that's what I did and I am not sorry about it.  I am sure she didn't even pay attention to what I was watching.  It was pretty loud though, so had she been listening to my TV she would have definitely heard what it was saying.  But she has an ability to tune things out and become engrossed in her books while she eats.  But that's okay, I did it for me, not her.  Well, a little bit for her, but it's not like it will change anything.  I just like holding people accountable when they refuse to take accountability.